The Birth of a Super Hero
The secrets of the Universe are figurative in language, which is why truths can be found in metaphors.
It's a thing, okay?
Alleglore. Like a sneeze..you know. The only way you can potentially worm your way out of rear-ending someone because it's technically considered an act of God.
That's what an alleglore is.
An act of God.
It's like this...an allegory is basically a story-sized metaphor, using symbols to reveal hidden meaning or larger truths...
Lore is basically the backstory that explains the current situation in a story.
Alleglore makes sense...I promise...I made up a new word.
The Ocean and the Sunglasses
Why would anyone want to live next door to heaven?
Hell is the absence of heaven.
A perfect evil would make heaven a drug.
A perfect evil makes the devil a drug dealer.
These are the lies you depend on to feel alive.
You get addicted to heaven and become a slave to the cravings...until you get a little creative, this is.
Fantasizing about heaven wasn't actually saving her.
Maybe you could find heaven earth.
Maybe she was getting fooled again and this was the devil calling her back.
Once she had grown suspicious of the water and it's mysterious ways, she stopped going into it. She might have been addicted to heaven, but she definitely was not addicted to hell, which is how she figured out her limits.
If she went in the ocean, it always felt good but that moment of ecstasy ended quickly and she liked to keep the buzz going for awhile without the water instantly erroding her dreams. Today the ocean was luring her though and she didn't even try to resist because it was already game over. Her spirit was dying, so nothing mattered anymore and might as well live it up, while she still had a heart.
Ask she basked in the glory of this moment the curse of over-indulgence started to urge. She wanted more of this. Every bit of it. Take her deeper, and so she dared to catch a glimpse of the sun.
She felt so alive, so protected by truth that she needed to see it once and for all with her eyes. She knew it was brilliant, but she'd also heard that it could make her go blind. Maybe she was too high to care. So, took a look at the sun just to feel what would happen.
When she did, her bubble burst and fell out of her womb. It looked like the sun winked at her. Wait, was it really alive? No, she blinked. Wait, what happened? Was she blind? What's this black thing floating in front of her?
And then got slapped in the face with a wave. And then hit with another.
Wave after wave they were pummeling her out of nowhere. It was like the ocean got angry and now she felt afraid.
She hadn't had time to take a breath and the water was pulling her under. She was tumbling her around trying to figure out how to come up for some air, but she never found it.
As usual, she hadn't listened to what she had been told. She was drowning now. It was over. She'd taken in just a little too much heaven and her addiction had finally won. Her lungs felt hot.
She decided it was time to stop fighting and she accepted her fate. So, she silently succumbed herself to the waves.
As she sank deeper below the angry siege, she felt sound in her decision to quit the struggles above. Safe and calm beneath the surface, she had outsmarted the ocean. She was going to ride this one out down below. It wasn't worth fighting. She'd try again once the ocean calmed down. What was weird is that she knew that all this was happening even though she also thought that she had drowned. Is this how people survive after a drowning? They hold their breath a lot longer than they thought how?
When the set finally ended, she popped back up to the surface. Grateful to breathe, she was equally pleased that she had outsmarted the ambush. This time she had won, except she couldn't hold her breath very long before any of this and something was up with the sun. Or down you could say. What she noticed was that more time had passed than humanly possible. The sun was now setting behind the horizon and what began as a reflection of heaven now burned like the fire of a dangerous hell. It had been the middle of the day when she had entered the water. The sun was directly above when she checked. How could the day be going down right now? She reached for her sunglasses to study her surroundings and shield her confusion.
Perched on her head was a bit of seaweed, not the companioin she kept to protection the light from her eyes.
Sure enough, it had happened again. She lost her sunglasses in the water and she wasn't the least bit surprised.
Once again, the ocean had stolen her sunglasses...and no, this wasn’t the first time it had committed the crime.
This time, she'd had enough of it. She’d been through this same thing too many times before and she was over it.
A superhero was born on the day the Sassy one called up to the universe to file a complaint about the ocean stealing her sunglasses and accidentally spoke to the truth instead.
This is a playback of the whole call.
The Sassy One: “You gotta be freaking kidding me. What the heck was THAT all about Ocean? Yeah, don’t play dumb, you know what you did. It’s pretty condescending how calm and clear you’re acting right now, like you’re all innocent and don’t know what I’m talking about. Don’t even try it you frigging manipulator. You're a real piece of work, you know that? I’m onto you and I don’t like it. How many pairs of sunglasses do you own at this point, huh? You’ve got like 5 or 6 pairs of mine. Do you have some kind of a problem with how attached I get to them? Are you jealous I like my sunglasses more than you? Get over it. They're the ONE thing that actually make me feel good about myself. You don’t! You make me cold, irritated, itchy and ugly.... and then take my sunglasses to boot! What’s up with you ocean? My God. Now I’m supposed to waste my time trying find a new perfect pair just so you can try and snatch them again?...wait. No. I’m not doing that! I can't keep this up. I want my sunglasses back! The ones you took. I need to get to the bottom of this. To the bottom of YOU. I want them back and I want some answers. Like, WHY? Why do you keep doing this to me? You’ve left me vulnerable and confused one two many times, you stupid ocean. You can't keep getting away with doing things like this. It isn’t right! Somebody needs to put a stop to it and that somebody is me. You can go ahead and call me a Karen, I dare you. I’ll be a Karen in all caps, if that’s what you want me to be. Bring it on! I need to speak to the universe. I'm calling your supervisor.
The Sassy one, a bit more respectful and much less maniacal : HELLO?! Universe? Are you listening? I need to talk to you about something. I have a concern about one of your systems down here and I would like to file a complaint.Universe: “We are experiencing a high volume of calls, if you would like to return to the menu of self service options, press the north star.”
TheS1: “North Star? What North Star? The asterisk? Don’t disconnect me over this! Craaaap....I'm just going to press zero over and over aggressively until I actually get a real all knowing source...0, 0..00..00000000!!!!!!!
Wait. What am I doing? I’m not ACTUALLY on a phone. Ugh! Why does everything have to be so frustrating!? Don’t play me like that, universe. Answer me!"
Universe: "Hello, you’ve reached the center of the universe where we deny that life is actually organized chaos and pretend like what’s going on is completely within our systems of control. For customer service satisfaction and quality purposes, this conversation may be recorded in the living book of life for future spiritually awakened confirmation, spiritual wars and theological discourse.... to whom do I have the pleasure of speaking?"
TheS1: “Oh my goodness, thank you for actually picking up! Don’t you know who this is? I've gotten through to you before...it was a long time ago, but I did. Listen, I don’t normally do this kind of thing and I don’t mean to be difficult but, I think there is a problem with one of your systems down here.”
Universe: Which one?
TheS1: The ocean. It's definitely not working right and it's causing a lot of problems for people.
Universe: The ocean is my most perfect system.
TheS1: Yeah, okay, well, about that. I just want you to know that your preciously perfect ocean stole my sunglasses. It’s done it before, too. Like a lot. I don't think it's fair when a system doesn't work right and repeatedly victimizes the same people for no reason.
Universe: What makes you think the ocean has no reason? She is perfect. I made her.
TheS1: Well, I think she has no reason because I can't figure out what stealing my sunglasses does for her? It’s a girl, by the way? How did I not know that? OF COURSE it’s a girl! Either way, she can't wear my sunglasses, so she’s just being a bitch. My sunglasses are my confidence. I’m protected in them. I know what my image is, so it just feels like it's a personal attack because she just doesn’t like me, which makes no sense because everybody likes me, so I don’t get it. I mean, look at me. I'm more naked now than if she had ripped the top of my bathing suit off instead. At least then I could hide my shame behind my glasses and cover my chest with my hands. I'm so freaked out right now that I am talking to my imagination. I look like a crazy person and I’m not incognito! Has nobody filed a complaint like this before? She’s humiliating me! I think the ocean is a narcissist.
Universe: "No, nobody has filed a complaint about losing their sunglasses in the ocean before, because they tend to think it was their fault for wearing them in the water, in the first place. Why does this situation make you think the ocean has narcissism?
TheS1: “I don't know. Because I know plenty of people who wear sunglasses in the water and never get them stolen. It happens to me every single time. I feel targeted! I guess I don’t think the ocean knows who it is. Does SHE know she’s a girl? What if she thinks she’s a boy and she’s trying to flirt with me. I don’t know. It could be a sociopath? I have no idea, it just got all psycho on me. That’s not normal behavior.
Universe: I have never heard someone have the audacity to accuse the ocean of having a personality disorder. This fascinating is, tell me more.
TheS1: What?...well, okay, sure. So, yeah I mean today, the ocean looked all pretty like it was heaven. It had glitter on and everything... but when the sun was going down, it looked as if at night it turned into a fiery hell or something. That's a little alarming, don't you think? Kinda bi-polar...? I’m onto something, right? Right? Or am I crazy?
Universe: I thought you said the ocean might be a boy and narcissist, what’s this about pretty and glitter?
TheS1: Okay, I DON’T KNOW!? The whole thing is just pretty sketchy, let’s put it that way. All I know is that the ocean literally just stole something from me, tried to kill me so nobody would find out and then tried to play it off like nothing happened and it didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t know what that’s called! NOW it’s making ME look like the crazy one and blaming me for it’s psychotic waves. I don’t even see how that could even logically be possible. That’s called gaslighting you know. Crazy makers do that. The flip out on you and then blame you for their behavior. Just look at it! It has this tone as if it was MY fault that I lost my sunglasses because I made the choice to step into the water. It tricked me into going in...it hypnotized me! That’s the whole point! The ocean is NUTS! I can’t prove it obviously, other than the fact that I usually avoid the water and everybody knows that, but it looked nice today. I thought it was going to be chill. I mean, even my kid doesn’t trust the ocean. If he goes in his thighs start rubbing together and for a week he can’t walk right. The ocean seems like a creep. Can you please help me make sense of this, because I can’t seem to figure it out.
I don’t think ANYONE should be allowed in the ocean if it’s going to pull a 180 out of nowhere, take sunglasses, mess with crotches and then try to kill people, namely ME!”
Universe: Well, did you try to hurt the ocean or disrespect it?
Caitlin: “No. I never tried to do anything to it except enjoy it, which I never really did because it made my skin so itchy afterwards and I’d have a rash for days. I didn’t do anything wrong and I had no intention of hurting it. I liked it. No, I loved it and I wanted to indulge in it more, but like I said, it didn’t feel good after. Even still, I would go out of my way to take care of it and clean up the trash other people had left behind. I don’t know if the ocean was in denial about the trash or it didn't know it was there until I pointed it out by removing it or what. I wonder if when I started cleaning it up, it thought I believed it wasn't good enough as it was? I was just helping, that’s all. I mean, who knows. Maybe deep down the ocean’s not strong and it’s actually pretty fragile and insecure? We’ve never been to the bottom of it to know, know what I mean? It’s just that this whole thing seems pretty unjustified. I don’t think the ocean should be allowed to get away with this type of behavior, it's not fair.
Universe: “Karen, haven’t you been taught that life isn’t fair?”
TheS1: “Karen? It’s Caitlin actually. Did the ocean tell you to say that? Hold up. Are you in on this thing too? What’s going on here?
Universe: “I apologize, but you sound pretty Kareny, so has anyone told you life isn’t fair? That’s what I’m asking.
Caitlin: Yeah, probably, but I don’t listen to anybody. I just think whatever I want because I am probably an idiot and haven’t figured it out yet. That’s why I always ask so many questions because I want to learn and not feel so confused all the time. Maybe someday I will learn that I’m a fool. At least then I’ll know! So, if I’m a fool and life isn’t fair, tell me why? Why does it have to be so unfair? Why did I have to go through that? I thought I was going to die and I don’t want to die. I am actually one of those people who really likes life, a lot. I think it’s hilarious and beautiful and fun, I just get frustrated after awhile because I can’t seem to figure why I am so addicted to Heaven and never to seem to get in. I can’t make sense out of any of this. Did I love my sunglasses too much? I don’t HAVE to have cool sunglasses, I just tend to really like what I like and get upset when I lose them. It's not a vanity thing, I’m not that shallow.
Universe: "Do you think the ocean knew your depths?"
Caitlin: "No, I don't know the depths of the ocean either. What does that have to do with anything?”
Universe: "Maybe the ocean misunderstood you because you hid your depth behind your sunglasses."
Caitlin: "I mean, I guess that makes sense, but I still don’t think the ocean had the right to drown me to send a strong message. It could have written something in the sand or washed up a message in a bottle that said, 'You're glasses make you look fat" or something less aggressive and equally effective at getting me to remove them, you know?”
Universe: “Dually noted. Anything else?”
Caitlin: “No, I guess that’s all of it.”
Universe: “Thank goodness. You talk too much. Too many words get in the way, most of the time.”
Caitlin: “Time gets in the way most of the time, too. What’s your point?”
Universe: “You’ve always been looking for people to get you or in other words hear you and understand you. But, you didn't even understand yourself, so it made that hard. To fix that, I got you to 'get you', instead.”
Caitlin: “I'm sorry, what?”
Universe: “You have to understand the truth about yourself before anyone else can understand you or for you to feel heard. The experience of the ocean is a reflection of your self. More often than not, people just take the beating of the waves, the loss of their prized possession and they don’t even dare to ask why they deserved it or how it was fair.”
Caitlin: “They don’t?”
Universe: “No. Deep down for some reason, they feel like they MUST have deserved it, yet they just don't really understand how. They just accept it as life being unfair to them and over time they get more bitter and mad.”
Caitlin: “Well that’s silly, you can’t do life like that. That angle never works out. It’s like the moral of literally every story that’s ever been told. Bitterness + Anger = Bad.”
Universe: “They’re just not willing to do the work to comprehend the depth of the story.”
Caitlin: “Because they are helpless?”
Universe: “No, they’re too realistic. They literally only believe things they can see. The spirit of your soul lives inside your imagination. That’s why you liked those sunglasses so much. They protected your soul.
Words put the truth into form and creativity is the spirit of the world. Words are just the magic code of the universe that link the seen and the unseen outer world. You got lucky and cracked the code by using the most magical word of all.
Now all of the words that you use will hold magic. So honor this wisdom and watch what you say.”
Caitlin: “What was the magic word I used? Please? I don't think I said please. I'm not very polite."
Universe: “The magic word is not please, nor is it very polite. The magic word is WHY. Why will carry you up the stairway of truth."
Caitlin: “Why is how I learned the magic of the universe? When did I say why? I was actually just complaining.
Universe: “Yes. But then you asked me why the ocean did that to you...and then I told you.
Caitlin: "Wait. Let me get this straight. Was this all a set up? Did you put a hit out on me to get me to talk to you so you could try and get me to ask you a question l?”
Universe: “Yes. Because now I have you under my spell and you will work for me.”
Caitlin: “I KNEW IT! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it. Heaven IS run by a pimped our drug dealer! Forget it! I’m not yours. I don't work for you. Nobody owns me. I can do whatever I want. I have my imagination, sucker!”
Universe: “You can think whatever you desire and it will become true, but this doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s real. It's simple, but complex. That is why I tested you. You called out why because you must believe the depth of your nature understands love and when you know love, you know you aren’t meant to suffer. It doesn’t make sense. By not being able to accept this absence of logic, you just so happened to accidentally crack the code that unlocks the secrets of the universe. Your heart cried out to me why, not your mind which means that your heart was being held captive, but now it is ready to be free. You are ready to get closer to all love.”
Caitlin: “Wait, did I die? Am I actually in heaven?
Universe: “Yes. You’re spirit did and now it’s in heaven...but your body is still very much alive.”
Caitlin: “So, my spirit died and went to heaven but my body’s alive, so who the heck am I?”
Universe: “Sort of. You are born again.”
Caitlin: “My name is BORN AGAIN? Do I have to tell people that? What, do you think I’m a Kardashian or something?”
Universe: “Who do you think you are?”
Caitlin: “I think I’m Felicity, because I’m very good at expressing my thoughts, which makes me very happy.”
Universe: “Where are you when you feel happy?”
Felicity: “I’m in bliss.”
Universe: “Whose bliss?”
Felicity: “My bliss.”
Universe: “Felicity’s Bliss?”
Felicity: “I guess so, yes.”
Universe: “It’s interesting you say that, because I’m in Felicity’s Bliss, too.”
Felicity: “You’re in my happy place right now?”
Universe: “I AM your happy place.”
Caitlin: “So, what do you think you’re God or something? Are you a magician? Am I high?”
Universe: “Yes. I mean, no. I mean, sort of. This whole thing wasn’t EXACTLY my specific plan for you. It’s just something random that happened and you just so happened to go along with it. You had the ability to change your mind, but you didn’t. This might never have happened if you didn’t listen to your spirit and care about it dying. I play with all of you the very same way and more people than I care to admit don’t care about their spirit dying. Most of the time they don’t even know and just walk around completely dead inside.
To be completely honest in your case, I accidentally knocked over a bottle of vitamins and one of them fell into my melting pot. That’s what caused the ripples that produced those waves that crashed into your life that day. I just hang out up here in my lab and mess with stuff to see what everyone does. It’s kind of fun most of the time, but sometimes I get a reaction a lot bigger than I meant, or I mess something up by mistake. This ends up confusing all those structured and rational people down there. Most of the time they just chalk up my inconsistencies as “outliers” and ignore them. But, hey. That’s scientists for yah! The worst mystery solvers on the planet because they literally throw away all the clues that I send to help them solve the case. They came from monkeys, what do you expect? I’m supernatural alright but I’m not magician. I have ethics and morals and codes to adhere by. Natural laws that being a source has to obey. I can abracadabra things out of thin air, absolutely, but none of those things are an illusion. Everything I do is true. The magician is untrue. He is false. He is not high at all unless you are describing the position of his head in regards to his butt.”
Caitlin: “LOL! Oh My God! You are hilarious! You seem like somebody I could have a lot of fun with. Do you want to go smoke some weed with me?”
Universe: “Felicity, I'm as high as it gets and there’s no amount of weed that will get you closer to my level then you already are, so you don’t need that, but I like how you think. Listen. You’re curious and charming. This is good. You also appear to be quite gifted at articulating things in a way that makes people start to think differently...write that down, it might be a good note for you to have when you look for your purpose.
Felicity: “Why do I have to find my purpose if I’m in heaven?
Universe: “Because your body is not, so you have a mission.”
Felicity: "Okay, well, what is it?”
Universe: “I already told you.”
Felicity: “No you didn’t, or maybe I forgot.”
Universe: “The truth is found in everything that's never been said."
Felicity: “You told me to write down that I was good at writing things to use as a clue when I started to look for my purpose.”
Universe: “That’s right.”
Felicity: “Is my purpose to be a writer and tell everybody this story?”
Universe: “If it is, I never told you.”
Felicity: “The truth has to be inferred...it can never be said.”
Universe: "You got the good word. Welcome to the team."
Felicity: “What team?”
Universe: “You tell me.”
Felicity: “Oh my God. It’s you. I work for you now.”
God: “But you can’t tell anybody. It’s a secret. Remember, the truth is found in the spaces. The absence of thoughts and words. The world has to intuit me, just like you....tell your story, just don’t try to tell them it’s true...it’s just a story. Tell them you live by the motto to, “do it for the story,” and then tell them one. The truth will come to those who are ready.
And this was the beginning of her happy ending, when Caitlin became Felicity and accepted her job as a secret agent working for God and got away with it by telling everyone it was just a story.
It’s just a make-believe story about the ocean and some sunglasses.
Felicity’s Bliss is pretend.
I’m totally serious right now.